Still getting panic attacks?

How can you say you have control over your mind when you still get panic attacks?
A few people asked me this question and then I got into doubt. I asked myself this question and then day by day I started doubting my ability to control my mind.
This made me think about my depression phase and I believed that maybe I haven’t recovered yet. These thoughts again made me sick as I started losing control over my thoughts. I became silent and got no answer about my doubt. Then one day I shared this with my friend and she said something which cleared all my doubts in one shot. She asked me, “Did you know that it is all temporary suffering, did you know that you’d be fine by the next morning?” I answered yes. Despite all the thoughts that were coming to my mind I somewhere knew that this is all temporary. And then she said, “this is the control that you didn’t have during your depression phase. A believe that you’ll be fine! A believe that you can fight this! This is what you learned over time.” Then I got everything so clear.

Panic attacks are part of anxiety disorder. The feeling of fear, choked throat, increase in heartbeats, difficulty in breathing, nausea, sweating, shaking, etc are the symptoms of a panic attack. A few days back I experienced this attack which made my family anxious about me. They forced me to take the medicines I was prescribed earlier for such attacks but honestly, I don’t like those medicines. No doubt those medicines helped me during my depression phase but at that time I was unaware of the functioning of my brain. But I realized that things have changed now, I know that all this suffering is a nasty mind game. Somewhere I used to tell myself that I’ll be alright. I used to write a journal where I wrote about such bad days and I noticed that I have gained a lot of control over myself.

The intention of writing this is to provide a sense of comfort to those who are going through the same situation. I used to read people’s experiences and it helped me to know a lot. My mind gets out of control sometimes but now I can fight the situation. Mental health is not a joke. Mental illness cannot be controlled within a week or a month. It takes time and it requires consistency. One should be consistent in the process of recovery. Medication does its part but it cannot be taken for a long time. So there is a need for therapy and most importantly there is a need for acceptance, acceptance of the changes. One should be ready to accept the changes required in the recovery process. There should be a ray of hope that you’ll be alright. One should believe that being consistent with the process will bring peace in the end. Don’t let your mind play with the thoughts; don’t let it exaggerate the situation. Try to calm your mind rather than letting it free to think whatever it wants. You are not a loser, you are not abnormal, you’re in the making, in the making of the best possible. Believe in yourself.